one of my favorite words of all time.

one of my strongest allies.

sometimes, my only.

hope. plan and simple.

i doubted, and i sunk into my self-pity

like a lush with a fresh bottle of 20 year

old scotch: comfort. but these feelings

persisted, and the questions mutliplied.

and sometimes it would eat me up inside,

sometimes it would kill me to think about

it.

but as it is with God, it's not always a slap

in the face or a lightning bolt. it was just

a conversation about nothing. but it turned

into something. the final nod i needed to

get on with things.

i'm definitely so much different than i was

at the start of last year. to phrase a very

sad person, "i'm stronger than yesterday."

this year will be good, emotionally. but as

for other things... only One knows. i do

know that it will be different. very different...