upsetI found out my dad is a psycho. Worse than Jackyll and Hyde. If he took his medication like he is suppose to you couldnt ask for a better guy. But of course he is ornry from what I heard. I found out he tryed commiting suicide a bunch of times in his life but never suceeded. I found out that at one point in his life he went outside completely naked, jumped in his car and drove around to this neighborhood, got out and asked people door to door if they had any sheep. I found out one time in my life the night he got kicked out of the house here, he left in a jacket in mid july with a vacuum hose and sat on the side of the road with it hooked up from his exhaust to his window with the car completely sealed and he was found by a stranger and they called 911. I found out my mom and dad were suppose to get married but he was way to psycho and he just didnt care about me nor my brother. I found out he is a hypochondriac who is addicted to prescribed drugs from the doctors. I found out he didnt care that my grandpa Tom died back in 2006 due to lung cancer and kidney failure. I found out he threw major temper tantrums as in destroying the house if my grandpa Tom didnt have the kind of coffee he wanted. I also found out he slit his wrists open in front of my cousins when they were little. He did a bunch of other stuff too but im keeping that confidential.
When we got to my cousin's graduation party and after I met them for the first time in my life, my uncle greg started talking about my dad. You could tell the more he talked about him the more he got angered and did things alot quicker. when I found out about the things he did I felt ashamed of myself for the fact that I came from him. I cant believe my mom actually slept with him to get me. I have a feeling she was extra desperate at the time. The information is still slowly sinking in. I cry every now and then about it but I quickly get over it because its nothing to fret about really. Im just thankful that I did not inherit his sickness. If I ever had a thought in my head about what he probably had, I would either shoot myself or get help immediately. I dont ever want to turn out like him. I feel ashamed enough to hear that I have his eyes, smile, height, and nose. Pretty much everything. Everybody tells me I look like my mom but the more I look at this one picture of him, im pretty much the girl version of him all over again. Physically that is, not mentally. He is currently the last person on earth I want to meet. In fact I never want to meet him in my life. To think that his problem is, is that he is so smart that he is insane. He was on the honor roll back in high school and he always landed great jobs from what I heard. But that was his problem, he was way too smart. I also learned he does have the money to pay for child support, he just doesnt do it. He got kicked out of Minnesota and also kicked out of Florida but he went back to Florida anyways.
When I got home that night all I could do is cry about everything. I was happy but sad at the same time. It was a mixture of emotions at the time. Thinking about it now just tears me up inside knowing he was a psycho. Still is as far as everybody knows. Nobody has contact with him and if he is to ever set foot into somebody's house on my dad's side or my side even, the cops are to be called. Nobody wants anything to do with him. Cant blame them either. Im one of them. If I had to pick between trusting Charles Manson or him I would trust charles manson alot more. Ide feel alot more comfortable if he was my dad rather than Mike being my dad to be honest. I guess I can honestly say that I am the seed of chucky, but im the nicer one and not the psycho.
