You can do it all.

I know you can, and you should

not let things get you down.

Thankyou! And I'll try, I got my provisional driving licence in the post today, so I can start learning again (last time I had too much going on what with college+more), apparantly there's an instructor in town who does 20 lessons + a test thrown in for £200, which is cheap even before considering a test is at least £45 last time I checked... Even if they are crap it can't hurt to have some road experience just to start it off, I could just switch at the end of it if I need to perfect things

I'm proud of you

=]

 

Thankyou
Shyness and self esteem come in shades of grey, it's because nearly everyone experiences some shade of it that it's considered normal, but it could be cripplingly bad and it'd just be passed off as normal, or just a phase... as what happened when I was worse and needed to figure things out - years ago my parents and friends of the time had no sympathy and would press me harder for not being the outgoing face they wanted to see - but y'cant always overcome these things by shear force of will, it needs untangling first - it's too easy for them to leave that down to the person. I've gotten better over time, but I've also learned to suppress and hide some things so as not to offend ears that didn't want to think about the abomination they created - they (parents + old uni friends) undermined me but wanted me to appear happy (I think) so they didn't have to face/think about how I really felt at the time. They told me I had full control over what I felt so that they could blame me for it.

Blogging has helped me express things And I'm sorry for showing this side of things... I thought it best that it's known, generally, others will be like me too. It helps me figure stuff out by putting it to paper like this, but I'd also like your feedback - it's like samaritans keep telling me that some people only want someone to listen, and sure, some do, but I know, that some want more than that - I only share these things nowadays if I feel either I can help them or they can help me, I'm always looking for solutions, so I feel that my sharing of my mind would achieve something. Part of the reason organisations don't give advice or opinions is they don't want to be legally responsable (they don't know how enlightened we'd be), but without that, they're a bit more limited in what they can do.
I also appreciate that you boost me, by saying I'm a great guy I know it's only a consolation when people say it (because it seems to be often an anesthetic to ease the pain of the main thing being a no-go, so there's always a silent "but" after it), but I see the good intention, and appreciate it! I'm trying to be as honest as I can in all of this. It feels good too that you have faith in me, and I do choose to believe it, because of the side of human nature it comes from, the more important side.