Home alone freedom, Random Urges, and Pole Dancing

So I am home alone for 3 weeks. Mom's away visiting her old friend who used to live here, but had to move away because of her husband. It had been a few years that they saw each other, and they were friends since they were four years old, so I'm happy for her, and I can't say I don't like having the house all to myself, hehe.

I can go out and get a drink without worry of waking her up, and even go for really late night walks without her freaking out about where in the world I'm going at 3 in the morning! : P

Sometimes I get random urges to do things, like the other night I just had to run. I wanted to run and run until I just collapsed... so I went down my street a bit, but then saw bushes moved so I only ran back to my house. Could have been an animal or a person, either way I did not want to find out, being all I had to defend myself was a little pocket knife. Still fun though.

The boyfriend's going away for a few days with his family on a kayak trip. I wonder what it's like to have a family vacation. I've never been on one, never with both mom and dad, and rarely even with just one of them, on anything you could call a vacation. It seems they're quite well off. His house is beautiful! I hope if he ever gets to visit me here, that my house will be comfortable. It definately isn't as large, and it's not as nice looking. I'd try to keep it cleaner if he were here, though. Their house was always clean. Mom and I kinda slack off.

I guess this entry's more of a in-place-of-journal and might not be too interesting to anyone. I just finished the last page of my journal and I have no more to write in. I also need paper towel, maple syrup, and cheese. But anyways! Haha.

I'm thinking of pole dancing to make money. I always thought it would be fun, because I like dancing, and poles. XP

And I talked to the boyfriend about it (I don't think I mentioned his name yet, but it's Jayden) and he said he's fine with it, because the money will be going towards us visiting each other. I thought he might say no indefinately, but I guess he sees the reason in it, and I think it's a small price to pay (to dance and be looked at), in order to see him again.

I think it'd be different if it were touching, which I know he wouldn't agree with at all, which I would not even consider to begin with.

I mean, he said it's not the best job he'd like me to have, but if it means we get to visit each other more often, he'll accept it.

I plan on taking pole classes this summer, and by May when I'm out of university, I will be 19 so I can hope to audition at some places. We'll see how it all goes.

I've also become nocturnal... I go to bed at 5:30 and wake up around 17h30...

There's so much I want to do this summer, but at the same time I'd like to bask in having absolutely nothing to do, for it's been 3 years since I could say that. Every summer there's always been homework to get ahead on or catch up on or work on...

Even in the summer before grade 10. I think the last summer I had free was grade 8, which was a really crappy summer in terms of.. not having any friends and trouble with the friends I did have. But I guess it wasn't too bad... I did make out with a lot of guys. Take that as a good or bad thing I guess, but I was depressed so I kinda let it happen.

Alright, I rambled on enough. I'm so behind in my reading! Gah... Which upsets me but also makes me kinda happy because friends have actually been inviting me to things. :3 Mainly my friend Bobby who I went to a few concerts with and went to prom with as friends. He's a really nice guy and we always have fun together and he seems to be the only one who invites me to things. So yea.

I say I've rambled enough and I continue on! Well, I don't wanna go to bed! neh!

Waking up early in case Jayden's on before he leaves. He said he'll try to remember. I won't blame him if he doesn't because it might be hectic in the morning and he might not have the time. I'll still be up just in case. : )

ok, goodnight!