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10 hrs ago / @masivemaple +
Good news and bad news I finally have a date to get my gallbladder out—June 7 th , still more than a mo…
 
10 hrs ago / @masivemaple +
Dangerous Times! Today as I was trying to eat my strawberry banana smoothie I was viciously assaulted&helli..…
 I like this x 1
13 hrs ago / @deeterz +
109

I am so excited!!!!!!! I get to see my brother thursday night (tonight) and again monday morning!!!!!!!!!!! You guys don’t even know how excited I am to have this happen. He is going to spring break with friends that live in my state. They are going down south Florida. He lives like 300 miles away from me up norht. so we don’t see each other much. He is here in my state maybe only an hour away driving. but he is going to a frinds house and thats like 2 hours away tonight they are driving up to the air port and its only like 30 minutes from my work. and I work tonight. Hes going to go to his friends hoise to sleep. I guess technically friday morning at like 6 he has to get on the plane. but he might be able to talk his friend to make a pit stop at work and I’ll be able to show him around. Then Monday morning I am off and I am going to drive the 1 hour to the airport to see him for about an hour and its so worth it. He called me and wanted to see me now but its way out of the way to come to my place and see me  he thought I was working. So thats ok. 

 

 I like this x 1
yesterday / @newme +
OMG I understand the bear mindsaymoji now and I love it , thanks guyssssssssssss...…
 I like this x 1Have a Bear x 7Have a Bear x 7Have a Bear x 7Have a Bear x 7Have a Bear x 7Have a Bear x 7Have a Bear x 7
6 days ago / @hauntedwhisper +
It's good news week... Another busy day yesterday&helli... Appointments with my Endocrinologist a…
 
17 hrs ago / @rv1501 +
Losing Patience I would never wish anyone in their families to disown, despise, or even hate their loved one …
 
17 hrs ago / @souldesires +
Kassie and the Closing Shift My first 3:30 – 11 pm schedule is tonight. They’ve scheduled me for …
 
19 hrs ago / @neonite +
kindness, & gratitude

i've not been to the dentist since my senior year of high school. because i'm utterly terrified. 

i have a multitude of issues, & did then, but somehow (i'm not sure whether this is ineptitude on the part of my mother or the family dentist) no one realized that my dental issues were quite extensive until i was seventeen. & the course they jointly decided on was: meh, let her deal with it later.

thanks, guys.

so, my eye teeth were never corrected. my baby teeth weren't removed. replacements weren't created. i've just been chewing with these baby teeth ever since, & hoping that none of them fall out.

for the last uhhh two & a half years or so, one tooth in particular has been giving me trouble (i also have a dozen cavities, in various degrees of "holy fuck" ) but this one in particular, it's dead, & it's loose, & it's going to just pop out one day. 

i have dreams about it all the time. it doesn't even really hurt anymore, it just wiggles.. & itches? like it wants to be wiggled. like it wants me to pluck it out. 

i have had insurance for about a year and a half, but every time i think about going to the dentist, one of two thoughts stops me: 1) we can't afford what that dentist is going to tell me; 2) i don't have enough xanax to make myself go to that appointment. 

today john offered to make a cleaning appointment for both of us on the same day. i had never considered that. 

i seriously started crying with gratitude. 

i'll finally be able to go to the dentist!

 

 
20 hrs ago / @morte +
Today i was sending original song clips back and forth with a friend and then i realized ive never sang or p…
 Love x 1
2 days ago / @cas +
Another lunchbreak chat to myself, Part 23... Yet another midpoint of the work day has been reached, and thou…
 
yesterday / @weesaul +
just drinking caffeine products, doing something I shouldn’t and not having much success at it. …
 
yesterday / @palaceofperseph +
My Wednesday Today I woke up feeling really good. I feel like I slept pretty well and my mind wasn’t fo…
 
yesterday / @divine +
I feel like I don’t have any control over my life now. I have nothing to do all day, and I don’t …
 
yesterday / @cactusofdoom +
Well if I do say so myself Mindsay, you lookin mighty fine ^love that we have a whit…
 I like this x 3I like this x 3I like this x 3Cool beans x 1Love x 1
5 days ago / @findmyincubus +
Invisible Ink I really don’t have much to say lately. That’s not to say that things aren’t …
 
yesterday / @neonite +
A view from the Poop Deck... FINALLY, a NASCAR race worth watching! As I've previously stated, I don't w…
 I like this x 1
3 days ago / @rv1501 +
plugged in

there used to be a time…

(& that statement let's me know how old i am)

when i wasn't always plugged in. 

when i only checked things online once-twice a day, & not several dozen. 

& it's enjoyable, you know? to jerk around online. it gives me that internal feeling of accomplishment, even as i achieve nothing of actual merit. 

my phone is always on. it never dies. it's always playing music, getting texts, & emails..i'm always checking it. i panic if i can't find it. 

granted, part of my attachment is legitimate need; i have to check work emails a few times daily, & during the week, i must be aware of & responding to work texts in a timely way. 

but mostly it's the way it feeds into the inertia. how it gives me an excuse to sit still for a long time. how it keeps my brain moving in a weird, meandering way, down various rabbitholes of information & topics of social justice. how i feel like i'm doing something, even though i'm not. 

there are certain activities that are now devoid of joy for me, & i think it's because of the phone. it represents the behavior i use it for, & since i'm using it negatively, & in a creepy addict way, it taints scenarios that otherwise would be enjoyable to me. instead of just listening to music, i'm accessing the music on the gateway to inactivity. & what if there are notifications? i'll have to investigate. 

this whole line of thought is bumming me out. 

i've got to come up with a plan to fix this. 

 

 I like this x 2I like this x 2
5 days ago / @morte +
借分享 這篇文章寫... 也很幸運我... :) http://www.aihe...…
 
2 days ago / @cathy +
I had a great night. Alec brought me home a salad from a yummy restaurant and then loved me nicely…
 Love x 2Love x 2
6 days ago / @cas +
Back to the Blog Nice work, Adam. (I refer not to myself but to the guy running this blog service. This thing…
 I like this x 2I like this x 2
6 days ago / @schencka +
I decided... to accept the job! We really need the money. She offered $15, per child, p…
 I like this x 2I like this x 2LOL x 1Good idea x 1
6 days ago / @xRainbows4eveRx +
The Great 27 Woo, it’s my birthday!…
 I like this x 1
4 days ago / @neonite +
A thought for the day... My, my, my... Didn't Ted have quite the hissy-fit yesterday! The Donald was right,…
 
2 days ago / @rv1501 +
Got my new do today, and am feeling fierce. Had an allergic reaction to something that caused me …
 
2 days ago / @myspacebarbroke +
Human Factors *Posted from my phone so excuse errors* Slowly over the past couple of,months during…
 I like this x 1
2 days ago / @divine +
Another lunchbreak chat to myself, Part 22...

Having reach the midway point of another work day I find the thoughts of ‘what am I doing here?’ swirling about inside the quiet spaces of my cranium. I do not know if this came up in any of my previous entries here and I have absolutely no desire to find out, but I often have the feeling that I do not belong where I happen to be. Today I happened to experience this feeling on the long walk to work…

 

What am I doing here? ‘Tis one of the fundamental questions of my existence. Why am I here? And others of the ilk are all leading to the ultimate question of what is my purpose? And that is the bottom line – what is my purpose?

 

And it is quite possible I will never know the answer to any of these questions. I may never know why I am where I am at in life. I may never know what I am doing when I doing that which I do not know why I am doing so. I may never know what my purpose is in this existence…

 

And through it all, I always feel that the answer is just beyond the reach of my brain. So close and yet so very far away as it brushes across the fingertips of my consciousness. Maybe my thoughts are not long enough to grasp the truth. Or it is quite possible my intelligence level is not high enough to understand what my purpose is. I do not know, and maybe I shall never know…

 

And now get ye back to work, Mr. DeepThought…

 

 
2 days ago / @weesaul +
Some more complaining. I’m already $120 overdrawn in my bank account. I am throwing applications around…
 OMG x 1
4 days ago / @freakofnature +
Stress I’m feeling a lot of stress mounting up, in almost all portions of my life. It’s not great…
 
2 days ago / @neonite +
Quickie I was gonna blog some spiritual and uplifting stuff but then I got stuck sending out a resume and cov…
 I like this x 1
2 days ago / @divine +
Oh hell. Oh man oh no oh crap. Please just let this be a “late night feels” moment. I never wante…
 Love x 1
5 days ago / @freakofnature +
Anime: is the character gonna die? Me: I hope not Anime: oh! oh! It looks like she’s pulling…
 Sad Panda x 1
5 days ago / @deeterz +
 

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